Anything goes on Khaosan Road, whether it be eating fried insects, dancing the night away or zapping someone with a tazer. The strip and surrounding area is known as Bangkok’s ‘backpacker ghetto’, a hedonist’s hotspot and the location of my accommodation. Whilst you can find so much more than just debauchery, I must admit, drinking and the nightlife on Khaosan did consume a lot of my time.
A relatively cheap, yet luxurious flight with Qatar airways, with a brief stop in Doha’s grand Hamad airport, delivered me to Suvarnabumi - just in time to dive head first into a night out in the City of Angels. So I dumped my bag in the Khaosan Palace hotel, accommodation airing on the side of comparative luxury, and went to explore.
As my intended travel partner and local buffoon decided to wait until the day before to tell his significant other about the trip, I ended up making the voyage alone to begin with. However, after meeting a seasoned traveller on the flight, I got an impromptu tour guide for the first evening, until I could meet up with some other friends.
Walking along Khaosan Road for the first time in an evening brings a myriad of thoughts, sounds and smells. As you manipulate the drunken throng of people charging about between bars, the various vendors sense the naivety of a newbie and flock to sell their wares. These range from tailored suits, to laughing gas, or even wristbands featuring vile obscenities about eating genital salads – knitted by sweet, elderly Thai ladies. This accosting is accompanied by the sounds of banging Electronic Dance Music (EDM) seeping from the bars, the buzzing of tazers and the croak of wooden frogs.
A relatively cheap, yet luxurious flight with Qatar airways, with a brief stop in Doha’s grand Hamad airport, delivered me to Suvarnabumi - just in time to dive head first into a night out in the City of Angels. So I dumped my bag in the Khaosan Palace hotel, accommodation airing on the side of comparative luxury, and went to explore.
As my intended travel partner and local buffoon decided to wait until the day before to tell his significant other about the trip, I ended up making the voyage alone to begin with. However, after meeting a seasoned traveller on the flight, I got an impromptu tour guide for the first evening, until I could meet up with some other friends.
Walking along Khaosan Road for the first time in an evening brings a myriad of thoughts, sounds and smells. As you manipulate the drunken throng of people charging about between bars, the various vendors sense the naivety of a newbie and flock to sell their wares. These range from tailored suits, to laughing gas, or even wristbands featuring vile obscenities about eating genital salads – knitted by sweet, elderly Thai ladies. This accosting is accompanied by the sounds of banging Electronic Dance Music (EDM) seeping from the bars, the buzzing of tazers and the croak of wooden frogs.
After finding your bearings and contemplating the various drink offers on display, pick a bar and experience the nightlife first hand. Bangkok is probably considered expensive for Thailand, but it’s still substantially cheaper than the UK. As a rough guide, a large bottle of Chang (the Thai equivalent of Carling) will set you back around 80/90 Baht (£1.55-£1.75). Cocktails come by the glass (100-150 Baht/ £2-£3), or by the bucket (150-250 Baht/ £3-£4.85); which may not sound dirt cheap, but contains an ungodly high ratio of alcohol to mixer.
If you’re feeling brave, and want to cheapen things up, try the Sangsom or Hong Thong rum. There’s probably a good reason you can’t bring that stuff back into England - it puts hairs on your eyeballs. It also causes some to become possessed by evil Sangsom spirits and do regrettable things. Things such forgetting your name, or conversing with women in alleyways long enough for them to empty your pockets of electronic goods. But I won’t publicly name who that happened to.
Whilst garish EDM is a popular choice with most venues, there is variation to be found. My favourite was called Bar Next Door, due to slightly superior music and the people it seemed to attract regularly. People like the Irish guy who thought he was Conor McGregor, or the Australians with a penchant for lady-boys.
If you’re feeling brave, and want to cheapen things up, try the Sangsom or Hong Thong rum. There’s probably a good reason you can’t bring that stuff back into England - it puts hairs on your eyeballs. It also causes some to become possessed by evil Sangsom spirits and do regrettable things. Things such forgetting your name, or conversing with women in alleyways long enough for them to empty your pockets of electronic goods. But I won’t publicly name who that happened to.
Whilst garish EDM is a popular choice with most venues, there is variation to be found. My favourite was called Bar Next Door, due to slightly superior music and the people it seemed to attract regularly. People like the Irish guy who thought he was Conor McGregor, or the Australians with a penchant for lady-boys.
A lot of places also play live music, and good live music at that, albeit with the odd lyrical mishap. Otherwise, stick it alfresco with the pop up bars and booze stands that sprawl into the street, ambient places to grab a quick cocktail and observe shenanigans. The vibe at each one varies massively and it means you can mingle easily as the crowd fluctuates up and down Khaosan.
However, a strange set of rules govern this area. Strictly speaking, all the madness is supposed to cease by 2 am – and it does to some degree. But for a while the police repeatedly drive along the strip, demanding the music is turned down, only for it to resume once they pass like an aural Mexican wave.
There is a few bars with licences which extend this curfew (Irish bar), but the strip does empty slightly; which on one occasion led to our decision to trust a street merchant’s advice to go to a nightclub for locals called ‘Spicy’. Spicy seems to be the Thai equivalent of The Red Lion in terms of pub nomenclature. This particular branch, if you can call it that, had to explicitly state that grenades weren’t allowed inside. It cost more than back home, so one to avoid.
After many night of excess on Khaosan, it can become repetitive so we opted to take a trip to the many Soi’s (roads) around Sukhumvit, with its bars and street stalls. Regrettably we never made it to the sky bars, mostly due to a lack of appropriate dress code; but we did find a variety of sports bars with a wider selection of beverages, pool tables and even a cockney DJ playing classic funk. Not quite as hectic as Khaosan, but it did have its pockets of depravity, in the form of small streets full of go-go bars. Wait for the Pattaya escapade for more on those however.
Many seasoned travellers would probably have comfortably manipulated the BTS skytrain to reach Sukhumvit, but as cursory rookies we opted for one of the many Tuk Tuk’s that are charging about the city. Our driver, a Thai version of Colin McRae, ruthlessly weaved between far bigger, heavier vehicles; exploiting seemingly non-existent gaps in traffic and forming his own contraflow at a whim.
However, a strange set of rules govern this area. Strictly speaking, all the madness is supposed to cease by 2 am – and it does to some degree. But for a while the police repeatedly drive along the strip, demanding the music is turned down, only for it to resume once they pass like an aural Mexican wave.
There is a few bars with licences which extend this curfew (Irish bar), but the strip does empty slightly; which on one occasion led to our decision to trust a street merchant’s advice to go to a nightclub for locals called ‘Spicy’. Spicy seems to be the Thai equivalent of The Red Lion in terms of pub nomenclature. This particular branch, if you can call it that, had to explicitly state that grenades weren’t allowed inside. It cost more than back home, so one to avoid.
After many night of excess on Khaosan, it can become repetitive so we opted to take a trip to the many Soi’s (roads) around Sukhumvit, with its bars and street stalls. Regrettably we never made it to the sky bars, mostly due to a lack of appropriate dress code; but we did find a variety of sports bars with a wider selection of beverages, pool tables and even a cockney DJ playing classic funk. Not quite as hectic as Khaosan, but it did have its pockets of depravity, in the form of small streets full of go-go bars. Wait for the Pattaya escapade for more on those however.
Many seasoned travellers would probably have comfortably manipulated the BTS skytrain to reach Sukhumvit, but as cursory rookies we opted for one of the many Tuk Tuk’s that are charging about the city. Our driver, a Thai version of Colin McRae, ruthlessly weaved between far bigger, heavier vehicles; exploiting seemingly non-existent gaps in traffic and forming his own contraflow at a whim.
A tuk tuk, before you ask, is sort of like a moped with a cage attached to the back. They have a mesh on one side as some sort of half-hearted attempt at safety, considering there are no seatbelts and one side is exposed. These death-carts can comfortably accompany three passengers, but you’ll frequently see them packed to the rafters. I’ve probably sold them as some sort of journey through Dante’s Inferno, but in all honesty riding in one is a lot of fun.
When getting a Tuk Tuk there are a couple of things you should remember, primarily to insist that you go straight to the location you’re after. Otherwise you’ll be taken on a shady detour to a jewellery shop, tailors or soapy massage parlour (brothel) that the driver has a deal with. Secondly, once the driver sees a Farang like us bouncing towards them, they immediately know they can bump the price up. There are seldom places you’ll want to visit that should be costing more than 100 Baht in a Tuk Tuk, so be polite but don’t settle for more.
That being said, as we discovered, kindness can go a long way with the Thai people. Something as small as offering a light for a cigarette can lead to priceless advice, such as pointing out the difference between yellow and green licence plates and white and black ones. Apparently the former are government owned and therefore cost more. With the latter we were able to get a Tuk Tuk to take us round multiple tourist sights for just 30 Baht, with the driver waiting for us to wonder round each place. That kind of customer service is unparalleled.
Sadly, the lure of nightlife after recently reuniting with good friends did hamper the pursuit of daytime tourism slightly. However, as aforementioned, I did manage a few sober activities. Bangkok is brimming with temples, parks and splendid views of the city; with its vast contrast between modern, towering skylines, intricate rooftops of the wats, and slum-like shanties. These decrepit looking buildings are often a reverse façade, with all the efforts concentrated on the interior.
I would highly recommend a visit to the Golden Mount (Wat Saket) for those who enjoy beautiful architecture, taking in some culture, learning a bit of history and a good walk. The highest point in the city until the 1960s, Wat Saket provides the perfect 360 degree viewpoint and is fairly inexpensive compared to other temples. It was also once a centre for the disposal of corpses, during the Cholera epidemics that killed hundreds of thousands of people throughout the 19th century.
Nowadays though, it even has wifi on the roof for those who can’t resist instantly uploading a selfie with the Buddah statues on social media. I couldn’t help but feel it was a bit disrespectful, bombarding technology onto such a sacred site, especially amidst those trying to pray and pay tribute. But from the amount of money people were donating, displayed along a giant clothesline, I don’t think the monks minded too much.
Other than sightseeing, shopping can be another fun activity providing you have the energy. Markets and stalls exist all over the city and you can find pretty much anything in the street markets. Alarmingly, this includes the odd hand gun, throwing stars and a variety of tazers. The latter of which are available to use on a companion if you haggle a little.
Haggling is something that takes time to perfect, but once you get the hang of it you’re open to a whole host of bargains. Assuming you genuinely want to buy something you should counter with half of the first price you’re offered. If they don’t meet you close, you can try the smiling and walking away tactic, which should prompt them to call you back with another offer. This way you’ll usually get the goods for close to 50 percent of the original asking price. But always be polite.
If you want to shop a bit more high-tech or want authentic brands, as opposed to convincing market copies dubbed ‘same same but different’, then there are a number a massive cineplex shopping centres. Worryingly, they all have heavy security and metal detectors at the entrances, so if you’ve bought some daft contraband from the market you’ll have to get rid. These complexes often have several floors neatly packed together, with hundreds of shops efficiently organised to group similar products or consumer demographics. Better still, the top brands are all affordable, so you can go a little nuts as I did.
All this activity works up one monstrous appetite, but luckily you’re in the perfect place to remedy that. Before travelling, I was pretty excited to try some authentic Thai food, having taken a bit of a fancy to it towards the end of my time at university. If it was good in a place like Preston, it had to be superb in Bangkok. I wasn’t mistaken.
Street food takes Thai cuisine down to its most unrefined form and it’s fantastic. If you think a kebab is good when you’re inebriated, wait until you get your mouth around some Pad Thai from a street vendor. Choose the base ingredients and type of noodle, and they’ll conjure a delicious dish in no time whatsoever. ‘Thai time’ does not apply to food.
Other than sightseeing, shopping can be another fun activity providing you have the energy. Markets and stalls exist all over the city and you can find pretty much anything in the street markets. Alarmingly, this includes the odd hand gun, throwing stars and a variety of tazers. The latter of which are available to use on a companion if you haggle a little.
Haggling is something that takes time to perfect, but once you get the hang of it you’re open to a whole host of bargains. Assuming you genuinely want to buy something you should counter with half of the first price you’re offered. If they don’t meet you close, you can try the smiling and walking away tactic, which should prompt them to call you back with another offer. This way you’ll usually get the goods for close to 50 percent of the original asking price. But always be polite.
If you want to shop a bit more high-tech or want authentic brands, as opposed to convincing market copies dubbed ‘same same but different’, then there are a number a massive cineplex shopping centres. Worryingly, they all have heavy security and metal detectors at the entrances, so if you’ve bought some daft contraband from the market you’ll have to get rid. These complexes often have several floors neatly packed together, with hundreds of shops efficiently organised to group similar products or consumer demographics. Better still, the top brands are all affordable, so you can go a little nuts as I did.
All this activity works up one monstrous appetite, but luckily you’re in the perfect place to remedy that. Before travelling, I was pretty excited to try some authentic Thai food, having taken a bit of a fancy to it towards the end of my time at university. If it was good in a place like Preston, it had to be superb in Bangkok. I wasn’t mistaken.
Street food takes Thai cuisine down to its most unrefined form and it’s fantastic. If you think a kebab is good when you’re inebriated, wait until you get your mouth around some Pad Thai from a street vendor. Choose the base ingredients and type of noodle, and they’ll conjure a delicious dish in no time whatsoever. ‘Thai time’ does not apply to food.
If you’re not feeling noodles, wander about and pick up various grilled meats, corn on the cob, spring rolls, fresh fruit or if you’re really adventurous, try an array of insects that are on offer. The most common seem to be scorpions, which get thrust under your nose wherever you turn. I don’t know where they source them all from, but they taste disgusting. If you could image the taste of sawdust mixed with Marmite, that’s what it’d be akin to – not that I used to eat from the rabbit’s hutch or anything.
Unfortunately I can’t recommend any of the top, acclaimed restaurants if you’re after a swanky sit down meal, as we stayed around Khaosan for most mealtimes. However, we did try what was Trip Advisor’s #1 ranked establishment – Suzie Wong’s, on Khaosan. It was tasty, but by no means my favourite; that accolade is split between many restaurants on Rambuttri Alley.
Rambuttri runs parallel to Khaosan, but it’s almost like a completely different country. With an almost Mediterranean feel, food takes priority over drink; and it’s characterised by less dancing, more relaxing and multifarious cuisines, which are all accompanied by acoustic music. I could have happily eaten every meal there and found something different to enjoy each time, with the highlights being to be the crab fried rice, chicken cashew nuts and pork satay. Although it was on this street, in the Macaroni club, where I found my all time favourite Thai dish: Pineapple fried rice.
With so much to cram into just the five days I initially spent in Bangkok, I did leave with some reluctance, but also with wonder about what the rest of Thailand had to offer. Would there be some respite from the madness and the risk of being tazered? Surely the rest can’t be as debauched as Bangkok, can it? I suppose when you consider that Khaosan is near enough spelt with the word chaos, it’s no surprise that anything goes.
Unfortunately I can’t recommend any of the top, acclaimed restaurants if you’re after a swanky sit down meal, as we stayed around Khaosan for most mealtimes. However, we did try what was Trip Advisor’s #1 ranked establishment – Suzie Wong’s, on Khaosan. It was tasty, but by no means my favourite; that accolade is split between many restaurants on Rambuttri Alley.
Rambuttri runs parallel to Khaosan, but it’s almost like a completely different country. With an almost Mediterranean feel, food takes priority over drink; and it’s characterised by less dancing, more relaxing and multifarious cuisines, which are all accompanied by acoustic music. I could have happily eaten every meal there and found something different to enjoy each time, with the highlights being to be the crab fried rice, chicken cashew nuts and pork satay. Although it was on this street, in the Macaroni club, where I found my all time favourite Thai dish: Pineapple fried rice.
With so much to cram into just the five days I initially spent in Bangkok, I did leave with some reluctance, but also with wonder about what the rest of Thailand had to offer. Would there be some respite from the madness and the risk of being tazered? Surely the rest can’t be as debauched as Bangkok, can it? I suppose when you consider that Khaosan is near enough spelt with the word chaos, it’s no surprise that anything goes.