Dogfight is possibly the greatest card game in existence, requiring memory skills, a great deal of cunning and a sprinkle of luck.
The rules are very similar Shithead, bar a few twists, with the aim being to get rid of all your cards as soon as possible to avoid finishing last as the 'Shithead'.
The game is best played with between three and six people, using a standard 52 card deck.
Set up
Each player is dealt three face-down cards which remain unseen and three more cards dealt face-up on top. Three more face-down cards are given to each player and these form the 'hand', with the rest stacked in the middle of the table.
Players are free to exchange cards in their hand with their face-up cards before the game starts, ideally leaving the strongest three cards face-up. These cards can't be swapped again once the game starts.
The rules are very similar Shithead, bar a few twists, with the aim being to get rid of all your cards as soon as possible to avoid finishing last as the 'Shithead'.
The game is best played with between three and six people, using a standard 52 card deck.
Set up
Each player is dealt three face-down cards which remain unseen and three more cards dealt face-up on top. Three more face-down cards are given to each player and these form the 'hand', with the rest stacked in the middle of the table.
Players are free to exchange cards in their hand with their face-up cards before the game starts, ideally leaving the strongest three cards face-up. These cards can't be swapped again once the game starts.
Game play
For the first game anyone can start by playing a 3, or if no one has a 3 in their hand then a 4 (or 5 and so on). In subsequent games the reigning 'Shithead' always starts (more on this later).
Play continues in a clockwise direction with each player laying a card, or multiple cards of the same value, onto the play pile to beat the previous one (see card values below). Everyone must have at least three cards in their hand, taking from the stack in the middle to replace any that are played until they're all gone.
Once someone is unable to go they must pick up all the cards from the in-play pile, with the next person free then to play anything.
If four of a kind are played consecutively, the in-play pile is burnt (removed from the game) and the player gets another turn.
Once the middle stack is gone and the cards in hand have been played, then the three face up cards can be used. These cards must remain in place until they can be played, but you may play two or three of the same value together.
Only when these are gone can a player use the blind face down cards, but without looking or knowing what they are. If someone turns one over but is unable to play it, they may keep this in their hand with any others they pick up on.
The first person to finish is the 'President', but play continues until someone is last - the 'Shithead'. Often finishing last can mean some gnarly forfeit in the form of a shot or despicable foodstuffs, but it also means relinquishing your best card to the President in the next game (in exchange for their worst).
With five or six players, add in a 'Vice President' for second and a 'Vice Shithead' for second last - these swap one card and the President and Shithead swap two cards.
Card values
An Ace is the highest card value, ranking down to 2 (A, K, Q, J etc.). However, there are a number of power cards which have added rules:
For the first game anyone can start by playing a 3, or if no one has a 3 in their hand then a 4 (or 5 and so on). In subsequent games the reigning 'Shithead' always starts (more on this later).
Play continues in a clockwise direction with each player laying a card, or multiple cards of the same value, onto the play pile to beat the previous one (see card values below). Everyone must have at least three cards in their hand, taking from the stack in the middle to replace any that are played until they're all gone.
Once someone is unable to go they must pick up all the cards from the in-play pile, with the next person free then to play anything.
If four of a kind are played consecutively, the in-play pile is burnt (removed from the game) and the player gets another turn.
Once the middle stack is gone and the cards in hand have been played, then the three face up cards can be used. These cards must remain in place until they can be played, but you may play two or three of the same value together.
Only when these are gone can a player use the blind face down cards, but without looking or knowing what they are. If someone turns one over but is unable to play it, they may keep this in their hand with any others they pick up on.
The first person to finish is the 'President', but play continues until someone is last - the 'Shithead'. Often finishing last can mean some gnarly forfeit in the form of a shot or despicable foodstuffs, but it also means relinquishing your best card to the President in the next game (in exchange for their worst).
With five or six players, add in a 'Vice President' for second and a 'Vice Shithead' for second last - these swap one card and the President and Shithead swap two cards.
Card values
An Ace is the highest card value, ranking down to 2 (A, K, Q, J etc.). However, there are a number of power cards which have added rules:
10 - The Burner: This can be played anytime and causes everything currently in play to be 'burnt' or discarded from the game (including the 10). Whoever plays this then gets to play again, making it the best card in the game.
8 - Invisible: An 8 is see-through, meaning the next player has to beat the value of the card underneath it. It can be played on top of any other card, but if it's played first then it has a value of 8.
2 - Reset: A 2 can also be played anytime and essentially resets the pile, since any other card is high enough to be played on top of it.
7 - The Twist: After playing a seven the next person has to play a card of lower or equal value. However, unlike the other power cards, a 7 can only be played on top of a lower or equal card. This means it can be equally useless or frustrating, depending on when/ how it's used. Once a lower card than the 7 is played, the game reverts to increasing value.
Other rules
A popular forfeit is to punish anyone who doesn't pick up cards when they should, making sure everyone concentrates and no one cheats. If someone is spotted without three in their hand while cards are there is still a face down pile, then that player must pick up all the cards in play - regardless if they can go or not.
An additional rule to cause chaos is to allow anyone to 'jump in' and play out of turn if they can complete four of a kind on the in-play pile. This allows them to burn the play pile and lay another card, with the game resuming clockwise from them.
If you have more than six players to start with, just deal two cards face down and two face up on top of them instead of three.
Catchphrases and terminology
To help make the game a tad more fun and to help with taunting your opponents or influencing other players there are a number of quality catchphrases, often rooted in popular culture:
Dog fight - The game takes its name from the stage where two or three players are left to slog it out in a battle of wits, often with lots of cards in their hand. It's good to tell people they're in the dog fight and even better to inform them they're not ready for the dog fight. Kudos for saying it in a Tony Bellew-esque style.
Clogger, dobber or steamer - These are the collective terms given to a large pile of in-play cards that have accumulated on the table, especially when full of low value cards such as 3s, 4s, 5s and 6s. Nobody wants to pick up a steamer and it's tempting to avoid burning a clogger just so someone else has to.
8 - Invisible: An 8 is see-through, meaning the next player has to beat the value of the card underneath it. It can be played on top of any other card, but if it's played first then it has a value of 8.
2 - Reset: A 2 can also be played anytime and essentially resets the pile, since any other card is high enough to be played on top of it.
7 - The Twist: After playing a seven the next person has to play a card of lower or equal value. However, unlike the other power cards, a 7 can only be played on top of a lower or equal card. This means it can be equally useless or frustrating, depending on when/ how it's used. Once a lower card than the 7 is played, the game reverts to increasing value.
Other rules
A popular forfeit is to punish anyone who doesn't pick up cards when they should, making sure everyone concentrates and no one cheats. If someone is spotted without three in their hand while cards are there is still a face down pile, then that player must pick up all the cards in play - regardless if they can go or not.
An additional rule to cause chaos is to allow anyone to 'jump in' and play out of turn if they can complete four of a kind on the in-play pile. This allows them to burn the play pile and lay another card, with the game resuming clockwise from them.
If you have more than six players to start with, just deal two cards face down and two face up on top of them instead of three.
Catchphrases and terminology
To help make the game a tad more fun and to help with taunting your opponents or influencing other players there are a number of quality catchphrases, often rooted in popular culture:
Dog fight - The game takes its name from the stage where two or three players are left to slog it out in a battle of wits, often with lots of cards in their hand. It's good to tell people they're in the dog fight and even better to inform them they're not ready for the dog fight. Kudos for saying it in a Tony Bellew-esque style.
Clogger, dobber or steamer - These are the collective terms given to a large pile of in-play cards that have accumulated on the table, especially when full of low value cards such as 3s, 4s, 5s and 6s. Nobody wants to pick up a steamer and it's tempting to avoid burning a clogger just so someone else has to.
Toying with (you/him/her) - When you have the power to make someone pick up, you might want to give them a stay of execution in the hope that more of a dobber builds up (and to get rid of a lower card yourself). There's no better way than to let them know they're being 'toyed with'.
Feed - When someone adds low or undesirable cards to the pile, they are feeding it. If it looks inevitable that an upcoming player will have to pick up a clogger, why not encourage other players to 'feed him/her'.
Take it - Once you are certain someone will be picking up cards, it's very satisfying to exercise your best impression of Steven King's IT (as played by Bill Skarsgard) by whispering 'take it' to them.
Lock-in - There is nothing more infuriating than having low values as your face-up cards, meaning other players can quite easily stop you from going or force you to pick up a steamer when the time comes. You can add to someone's infuriation by telling them 'it's a lock-in' each time they can't go.
Send (him/her) high/low' - While everyone is essentially in it for themselves, sometimes you do need to work together to prevent someone from escaping from the game. You can use this phrase as a simple way to give your advise on whether to play a seven or to play a high card, hopefully to ruin their escape.
Punish (him/her) - Similar to above but usually reserved for playing a high card to stump someone.
Shame - In true Game of Thrones style, this is a great way to mock someone who has finished as 'shit head', or who has cheated. Shame.
So there you have it, grab a deck of cards and some pals and test your wits in the greatest card game going - just try and avoid the dogfight. If you develop any other funny catchphrases while playing, let me know in the comments below.
Feed - When someone adds low or undesirable cards to the pile, they are feeding it. If it looks inevitable that an upcoming player will have to pick up a clogger, why not encourage other players to 'feed him/her'.
Take it - Once you are certain someone will be picking up cards, it's very satisfying to exercise your best impression of Steven King's IT (as played by Bill Skarsgard) by whispering 'take it' to them.
Lock-in - There is nothing more infuriating than having low values as your face-up cards, meaning other players can quite easily stop you from going or force you to pick up a steamer when the time comes. You can add to someone's infuriation by telling them 'it's a lock-in' each time they can't go.
Send (him/her) high/low' - While everyone is essentially in it for themselves, sometimes you do need to work together to prevent someone from escaping from the game. You can use this phrase as a simple way to give your advise on whether to play a seven or to play a high card, hopefully to ruin their escape.
Punish (him/her) - Similar to above but usually reserved for playing a high card to stump someone.
Shame - In true Game of Thrones style, this is a great way to mock someone who has finished as 'shit head', or who has cheated. Shame.
So there you have it, grab a deck of cards and some pals and test your wits in the greatest card game going - just try and avoid the dogfight. If you develop any other funny catchphrases while playing, let me know in the comments below.